With Joy

I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year's. We managed to have a good holiday (as you can see from the children's glee shown above) despite illnesses and a death in the family.

If you follow my Twitter, you already know that my husband's last grandparent passed away right before Christmas. This is the same grandmother who gave me so many craft materials over the years, including the plastic canvas S used recently. After her death, all of her crochet yarn and metal hooks were brought to me, as she had requested. I also have many other items she had given to me over the years. I feel honored to have so many of her treasured things about me and I'm happy that she is once again at the side of her beloved husband who passed nine years ago.

Between her death and my brain surgery, I seem to have been slapped with the truth that we are all here for but a moment. It's not that I didn't take death seriously already, it's just that death is brushing too closely by me lately.

The night she passed away, H and I were sorrowful. We had not visited her as much as we should have. But while it's true that we should have made more time for her, I knew that we had always brought her a lot of joy and had worked hard to give her a close relationship with two of her eleven great-grandchildren.

Sometimes your best is not all it should be, just all it could be.

A post like this usually ends with a plea to spend more time with those you love, but I won't tell you that. Until Death comes riding down your street, such platitudes are empty. I will tell you, though, that regrets are many and days are few. Too many die with "I wish.." on their lips, but Carmen died with joy. I hope when my time comes that I do too.